Never in my sixteen months writing this blog have I had a MEGA post combining both the laziness and poorly though out explanations for my NFL picks and the pointlessness of "End of the Month." Well, that is about to change right now. That's right, y'all, prepare to take out your reading glasses because this post is going to take a while!
Let's start things, as it should be, with football. Week 13 of the NFL season is upon, and this week offers up one of the best collections of games that we have seen in a single week. The best matchups of course are the ones that will take place on Sunday night and Monday night, receptively. First, it's the battle of first place in the AFC North as the Steelers take on the Ravens in what should be another classic between these two very evenly matched teams. The next day, its the battle for first place in AFC East with the Patriots and the Jets. Other notable games include a great NFC South matchup between the 8-2 Falcons and the 7-3 Bucs, the high flying Houston offense vs. the terrific Philly offense led by Michael Vick, the Jags trying to take solo possession of the AFC South with a win over the Titans, and much more. Should be exciting!
Speaking of exciting, so has my picks for the past two weeks. Two weeks ago I rebounded from several weeks with weekly records at the .500 mark with a 12-4 week 11. Then last week, I had another 12-4 week, including a 9-0 heading into the late Sunday after noon games (mj50 went a dissapoint 8-8) . Will this sudden luck of the draw continue for a third week in a row? That won't be determined until Monday. Until then, here's this weeks picks paired up with my usual explanations.
Let's begin (note: game times are based on the Central time zone):
Houston Texans vs. Philadelphia Eagles (-8): Thursday- 7:20 p.m.
mj15's pick: Philadelphia
The good news for the Texans is that they have Andre Johnson playing this game after only getting fined $25,000 for kicking Cortland Finnegan's ass instead of getting handed a suspension (rumor has it that the NFL purposely did it so the Texans wouldn't have a competitive disadvantage heading into this game which is broadcast by the league's own TV network) and may have found a way to stop Michael Vick through Chicago's winning gameplan from Sunday (pressuring Vick all afternoon, never wasting a time to try get up in his face, avoid making him throw to the left side of the field which he seems to do really well apparently, etc.). The bad news for Houston is a) that even with Chicago's gameplan from last Sunday, they still allowed Vick to throw for 333 yards and 2 TDs and b) Michael Vick is not Rusty Smith, whom the Texans defense completely shut out last week despite being ranked dead last in passing defense. Unless the conspiracy theory is true and the league adds on to it by randomly suspending Vick, then I do not see this one going down to the wire.
mj50's pick: Philadelphia
Buffalo Bills vs. Minnesota Vikings (-5.5): Sunday- 12:00 p.m.
mj15's pick: Minnesota
You've seen last week how good the Vikings could be when Brett Favre gets what he wants (in this case, having Brad Childress fired and Leslie Frazier step in to take his place). Expect the temporary Era of Good Feelings in Minnesota to continue this week against Buffalo. Speaking of Buffalo, If I were a Jets fan, a Patriots fan or any playoff contender trying to be among the twelve teams left standing at the end of the regular season, the last team that I would want to face right now is this Bills team. Sure they may be 2-9, but their last four losses have all been decided by three points, and those are four teams that would be in the playoffs right now had the regular season ended today (the Chiefs in OT, the Bears, the Ravens in OT, and, thanks to God apparently, the Steelers in OT). I have a feeling that they could very well have a second hand impact in the playoff picture, especially with the AFC East race.
mj50's pick: Minnesota
Cleveland Browns vs. Miami Dolphins (-4.5): Sunday- 12:00 p.m.
mj15's pick: Miami
Chad Henne is playing his second game back for Miami since returning last week while Colt McCoy is still out for Browns (meaning another game in which Jake Delholmme get to play awful while laughing to the bank the next day as he cashes in his shockingly high weekly salary). Unless Peyton Hillis puts up another monstrous 140 yard, 3 TD performance like he did last week (which I humbly thanks him since he single handily carried my fantasy team to victory and an 8-4 record this week with that huge game), I don't see any reason as to why the Dolphins won't come out of it on top.
mj50's pick: Miami
Jacksonville Jaguars vs. Tennessee Titans (-3): Sunday- 12:00 p.m.
mj15's pick: Jacksonville
The Jacksonville Jaguars are coming off an impressing four game stretch in which they have gone 3-1 (which the only loss being decided by four points) in which Maurice Jones-Drew has rushed for over 100 yards per game, David Garrard has averaged 255 yards and 2 TDs, have averaged 29 points per game and have found ways to win last minute football games. Overall, they're the team with the best chance of knocking Manning and the Colts for this season's AFC South crown. Tennessee, on the other hand, is another story. They have lost three straight, have barely used Randy Moss, and are without Vince Young for the rest of the season. Basically, they have gone from one of the league's ten best teams to a team that is falling apart. I'm taking Jacksonville to win this one and avenge themselves from their 30-3 loss to Tennessee earlier this season (especially if Rusty Smith is starting).
mj50's pick: Jacksonville
Denver Broncos vs. Kansas City Chiefs (-8.5): Sunday- 12:00 p.m.
mj15's pick: Kansas City
The rematch of the No Handshaek Game! How exciting! Actually, no it's not. The Chiefs are going to crush Denver. Speaking of the Chiefs, apparently their running game isn't the only part that has been working well for Kansas City recently. Apparently, Matt Cassel has the fourth best passer rating and a fantastic TD to INT ratio of 22 to 4, and Dwayne Bowe has been putting up historic receiving numbers with 8 TDs in the last four games. If the Chiefs do manage to beat the burning hot Chargers for the AFC West crown, expect them to be a major dark horse come playoff time.
mj50's pick: Kansas City
Washington Redskins vs. New York Giants (-7): Sunday- 12:00 p.m.
mj15's pick: New York
A Washington offensive line that has given up 28 sacks this season (ranking them among the bottom five in the category) takes on a New York Giants defense that has produced 31 sacks this season (tied for fifth most in the league). Is this a recipe of disaster for the Redskins? You better believe it!
mj50's pick: New York
Chicago Bears (-3.5) vs. Detroit Lions: Sunday- 12:00 p.m.
mj15's pick: Chicago
The Bears are among one of the hottest teams in the league, winning four straight games with Cutler playing his best football this season (and by "his best," I mean that he's producing stats while not making as much boneheaded mistakes as he did in, say, October), the offense is as explosive in years, Forte is running the ball well and the defense does a good job stopping the opponents in those situations where the offense just can't see to do the job (see: the Buffalo and Miami games). In other words, they are a completely different team from that which lost three out of four in October. Meanwhile, Detroit is, well, Detroit (with Drew Stanton starting this week, if I may add). So while this matchup has "trap game" written all over it with Chicago facing New England next week, I still see Chicago come out on top somehow. They've got their groove back, I tells ya! They've actually got their groove back!
mj50's pick: Chicago
San Fransisco 49ers vs. Green Bay Packers (-10): Sunday- 12:00 p.m.
mj15's pick: Green Bay
One of my favorite things to do as I first look at these weeks matchups: find out which games are played at 12:00 p.m./CT, see if any of the road teams are west of Denver and immediately decide on going against them. So far, it has paid off tremendously with only one or two slips through this entire season. Furthermore, I have a good feeling that the Mike Greenberg theory (my temporary name for this phenomenon since he was the first one that introduced me to the trend of West Coast teams playing poorly at noon games many years back while I was listening to "Mike and Mike in the Morning") will work again this week even though San Fransisco does have some elements in their game that could potentially stop Aaron Rodgers and that dangerous Packers offense.
mj50's pick: Green Bay
New Orleans Saints (-6.5) vs. Cincinnati Bengals: Sunday- 12:00 p.m.
mj15's pick: New Orleans
In a division where the Saints are battling another 3 win team and a 2 win team for first place in the division, expect New Orleans to come into this game 100% committed to win this one and to play their hearts to stay a three loss team and, at the very least, a wild card contender. I can't say the same thing about Cincinnati, who looked liked they completely gave up in the 4th quarter this past Thanksgiving and whose season is all but finished. The other reasons (Drew Brees>>>Carson Palmer, New Orleans>>>>>>>>Cincinnati) are obvious.
mj50's pick: New Orleans
HALFTIME! (Or In This Case, 1st Period Intermission) As you may have heard, another funny man was permanently taken away from us this week. Leslie Nielsen, best known for his roles in "Airplane!" and the "Naked Gun" movies, died this week of pneumonia at the age of 84. One of the greatest deadpan actors of his time, if not ever, Nielsen was best known for playing serious characters with a straight-face and a stoic demeanor. He will be greatly missed. To honor the passing of Nielsen, here he is in one of my favorite moments from the entire "Naked Gun" (and even the short lived "Police Squad!") series, the classic scene with Nielsen (playing detective Frank Drebin) umpiring a California Angels baseball game. That man sure knew how to entertain a crowd with ball and strikes.
Oakland Raiders vs. San Diego Chargers (-13): Sunday- 3:05 p.m.
mj15's pick: San Diego
So, it appears that San Diego is continuing its trend of starting out the season disappointingly, then heating up and ultimately playing like an unstoppable force in the second half, only to probably choke in the playoffs. After starting the season 2-5, the Bolts have won four straight and are playing like the team that they were supposed to be all season (even though, in defense to San Diego, they were ranked among the best offenses and defenses all season). Now, they're finally playing a game in December, a month in which they haven't lost a game since 2005. Expect their winning ways to continue again this week at home against a Raiders team that is suddenly struggling.
mj50's pick: San Diego
Carolina Panthers vs. Seattle Seahawks (-6): Sunday- 3:15 p.m.
mj15's pick: Seattle
I have no idea why. Home field advantage, I guess. Hey, speaking of 5-6 teams that have no right to be a first place team in any division but are just lucky enough to be in a division with other horrible teams...
mj50's pick: Seattle
St. Louis Rams (-3.5) vs. Arizona Cardinals: Sunday- 3:15 p.m.
mj15's pick: St. Louis
Is there still a possibility that the Cardinals could bring back Matt Leinart? Goodness knows that the Max Hall and Derek Andersen experiment haven't been working.
mj50's pick: Arizona
Atlanta Falcons (-3) vs. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Sunday- 3:15 p.m.
mj15's pick: Atlanta
See: all of my Tampa picks since week 7.
mj50's pick: Tampa Bay
Dallas Cowboys vs. Indianapolis Colts (-5.5): Sunday- 3:15 p.m.
mj15's pick: Indianapolis
Because there is just no way that the Indianapolis Colts will come back from being embarrassed on national TV by the Chargers by losing a game to a much more inferior Cowboys team, who have won only two road games all season and whose wide receivers can't hold onto the football in a game's most crucial moments, at home. There just isn't. I'm not even going to continue talking about this. Moving on...
mj50's pick: Indianapolis
Pittsburgh Steelers vs. Baltimore Ravens (-3): Sunday- 7:20 p.m.
mj15's pick: Pittsburgh
The best divisional rivalry in the NFL for the past five seasons renews! How exciting! In all seriousness, Pittsburgh vs. Baltimore has quickly morphed itself into the best divisional rivalry in the NFL. Not only have both of these two teams been two of the AFC's most successful teams since 2003 or so, but both teams are so equal in their blue collar toughness and style that almost all of the games between these two teams have been competitive, hard hitting and have produce some great down-to-the-wire excitement (with 5 of the last 6 games decided by six points or less). The fact that both of these right now are competing for first place in the AFC North just makes this Sunday's upcoming matchup even more compelling.
So...why did I pick Pittsburgh to win this particular game? Because of Ben Roethlisberger, of course! He has won four straight games against the Ravens and his offense has the edge over the Ravens offense since he ranks as the top quarterback in 4th quarter passer rating with a staggering 122.4. his opposing QB, Joe Flacco, has also yet to beat the Steelers #7 when these two teams faced each other head-to-head. I'm sure there is a significant amount of other good reasons, but I've decided to stick with these for now just because I feel like it.
mj50's pick: Baltimore
New York Jets vs. New England Patriots (-3.5): Monday- 7:30 p.m.
mj15's pick: New England
Tom Brady and the Patriots will strive to redeem themselves from their embarrassing week 2 loss to the Jets earlier this season. The Patriots are also one of the best home teams this season and since 2008, winning fourteen straight. Also, that Patriots team as a whole has been clicking really well in the last few weeks, with the offense averaging 38 points since week 10 and the defense finding ways to stop Peyton Manning and Ben Roethlisberger, whereas the Jets have had to fight the Lions, the Browns and the Texans to the very end during this span. In conclusion, while I do think that both of these teams are two of the best in the league, I think that it will be New England to come out on top following this game.
mj50's pick: New England
RECAP
The Undertaker at "WrestleMania" Lock of the Week: Indianapolis over Dallas
The 1969 New York Mets Winning the World Series Upset of the Week: Jacksonville over Tennessee
The Dan Marino vs. John Elway "I'm Not Sure" Pick: Pittsburgh over Baltimore
Be sure to come back next Wednesday as I will recap my picks from week 13 as well as turn in my picks for week 14, the week in which the NFL regular season is finally starting its thrilling conclusion. And now, here's the brand new installment of "End of the Month" recapping the best moments from the November that was.
END OF THE MONTH:
TV Ad of the Month: "Call of Duty: Black Ops- 'There's a Soldier in All of Us'"
Some are throwing hissy fits over this ad, particularly with the cameo of Kobe Bryant and how he's sending a wrong message to children, what with the shooting ammo and what not. Well, I for one like this commercial to be both wonderful and creative, so take that!
TV Show Premiere of the Month: "Conan"
I planned on writing a column specifically dedicated to the first few weeks of the show. But then I started procrastinating on it, delayed it for a few days, then ultimately just gave up on doing it. Overall, I have really enjoyed O'Brien's return to late night. Not only has he not missed a beat since returning from that eight month absence, but he has brought back some of that confidence and terrific on-screen presence that we saw during his final two weeks on "The Tonight Show." But then again, I was even willing to accept a mediocre start to the show. I'm just glad that my favorite TV redhead is back.
Videos of the Month:
-The Biggest Fail: "WGN Morning News Bridge Fail"
Chicago's very own!
- The Trickiest of the Tricks Play: "Driscoll Middle School Trick Play"
The Carolina Panthers should use that in their playbook for the next few games. Why not? It's not like their current playbook has worked for them this year.
- The Best Female William Hung Impersonation: "Psycho Girl Freaks Out When She Can't Sing the Right Note"
Don't worry little girl, I'm freaked out by your singing, too.
- The Most Slippery: "Sliding Cars in Seattle Snow on 11/22/10"
Nothing like being dangerously close to crashing your car to remind you that's its wintertime.
- The Best Cameo: "Down With Me (With Me and 50 Cent)"
This kid is taking over the freakin' world!
- The Best Freak-Outs: "Nicolage Cage Losing His Shit"
It's a video nearly 25 years in the making, and it was long worth the wait.
- The Most Epic: "TurBaconEpic Thanksgiving"
I think I got a heart attack just from watching that video. Imagine what would've happened to my body hate I actually eaten the whole thing.
- The Funniest: "Conan- First Show Cold Open"
Like I said earlier, it's great to have O'Brien back.
- The Most Awesome: "Woman Solve 'Wheel of Fortune' Puzzle With One Letter"
Love Pat Sajak in this clip. I bet he was asking himself which of the producers did she most likely sleep with to get the answer.
Banned Product of the Month: Four Loko
It's a good thing that the FDA did this just in time. According to some sources, the creators of Four Loko were planning on creating a new energy drink: "Zamm!," with 50% alcohol, 26 grams of fat, 2 ounces of cocaine and a free will for its drinkers to write on before they drank it.
Planned Marriage of the Week: Prince William of Wales and Kate Middleton
The presses are just glad that they've found someone else to stalk 24/7 in the form of Middleton.
Stories of the Month:
- The Most Political: The 2010 Midterm Elections
- The Most Controversial: San Francisco Bans Happy Meals and Circumcisions
Ah, California, the one state where marijuana is okay yet childrens toys and Jewish practices are banned! Don't you just love them!
-The Weirdest: South Carolina Man Arresting With Computer Mouse Inside Rectum
I love the fact that the man was hiding the mouse in the first place. It's okay to be found by polic naked but God forbid they found the precious computer mouse!
- The Scariest: North Korea Bombs South Korea Yeonpyeong Island
I'm just surprised that the people in charge of lanuching the missiles were able to reach the launch button! In all seriousness, though, this is a pretty tragic event. Hopefully, both sides can settle their dispute without going into war. With all the nukes the NK has, I don't even want to think of them fighting any war.
- The Most Awesome: Man Forced to Eat His Own Beard During Fight
I don't buy that story. I mean, have you actually seen this so called "witness"? The guy probably wasn't forced to eat anything for nearly 25 years.
Album of the Month: Kanye West's "My Beautiful Dark, Twisted Fantasy"
Certainly makes up for all his obnoxious arrogance over the past two years.
Return of the Month: George Bush Thanks To His New Memoir, "Decision Points."
What, did you actually think that he was going to go away? He's the Decider for Christs sake! If he wasn't stopped from a second term, what makes you think that he was going to stay away from the national spotlight?
Person of the Month: TSA Administrator John S. Pistole
Was there anyone more criticized and more villanized (other than North Korea, of course) than the TSA in this country? With their new regulations that would often involve more detail padding in areas like the genitalia and the new full body scanners, it seemed like these guys didn't get a single day of relaxation. The fact that this man was able to deal with the whole situation without getting fired should be recognized.
Well, that's going to do it! It took me nearly five hours to write this, so I hope that, in case you hated the material, that you at least appreciated the time and effort that it took into putting this post together instead of being glib about it. I will be back tomorrow with a new installment of "Random Thoughts." Until then, enjoy the rest of this crappy Wednesday!
Sincerely,
Your pal: mj15
If you have any opinions on today's post, or if you just have any suggestions or tips for my next blog entry, e-mail me at: mj1599@aol.com. Your e-mails are greatly appreciated.
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